I love to see the TEMPLE, I'm going there someday...

Through The Eyes of a Friend

For one of my classes my senior year in high school, we were asked to write a paper about ourselves from the eyes of another person.  I chose my best friend, and these are the things that I wrote.

Symone Stout is my best friend.  I have known her for many years, so if anyone knows anything about her, it is me.  Most of the time, she is a happy-go-lucky girl, but then there are times when she isn’t so happy.  A majority of the time, Symone is full of joy.  She always seems to have a smile on her face, and can brighten up my day when I need it most.  She is a caring person who likes to have fun.  She is one of the most amazing people I know, a one-of-a-kind girl.  She is very outgoing, and is herself around anyone.  Even if she is acting a bit crazy, it doesn’t matter.  She is comfortable with who she is, and isn’t afraid to show it.  She is very easy to get along with.  She has a huge heart, and cares about everyone.  She is determined in almost everything she does, she is persistent with whatever is placed in front of her, and she is smart.  She is a very upbeat person, and she tries to find the positive in any situation.  She is enthusiastic about life, and loves to do lots of things.  Whatever will help her be happy, she does.  Symone is also very respectful towards those that respect her as well.  She acts mature at times, and immature at other times.  It depends on the situation.   Then there are the times when she gets stressed.  When Symone gets stressed, you better watch out.  She gets really crabby.  She starts to get mad at little things.    When she gets into arguments, it always seems like it needs to be her way and nothing else.  After she is done being stressed, she realizes that how mad she was getting and what she argued about were things that she didn’t really need to act that extreme over, and then she goes on an “apology run”, where she apologizes to everyone she did wrong to.  She is stubborn in everything, whether it be her opinion, her beliefs, everything.  Nothing can pull her away from what she believes is right.  She, along with everything else about her, has some weaknesses.  One of the big weaknesses that she has is that she tries to please everyone.  When she makes someone upset, it throws her whole day off.  When she does something that makes another person angry at her or really sad at her decision, she starts to stress out and she, in turn, gets upset.  She knows that she can’t always please every single person in whatever group she is in, but she still tries, no matter how many times she fails.  Symone is really big on family.  She loves every member of her family, whether they treat her wrong or not.  She tries to show love and compassion at all times.  Of course, they are all brothers and sisters, so I don’t think that they get along at all times, but she tries to make things okay every day.  She is the oldest, so she has a lot of responsibility.  Instead of looking at it in a bad way, she looks at is as a positive experience, helping her get prepared for when she is out on her own.

I don't know how much of this is true anymore...  Probably a good chunk, probably not so much.  But I think I am going to do this again sometime soon, just to see how I would view myself if I was looking at me from another person's eyes.

Thanks

On this Thanksgiving Day, I have a lot to be thankful for.  So, here it goes.

I am thankful for...

- A family who loves me, no matter what.
- Friends who are there for me, through thick and thin.
- Roommates who love me for me.
- Faith and my religion, which keeps me grounded.
- A warm home/apartment to sleep in at night.
- Running water to use for drinking and getting clean.
- Food to eat and gain strength for the day.
- Forgiveness for the things that I have done in the past.
- Eternal love, which never ends.
- A Savior who sacrificed His life for mine and everyone who lives on this Earth.
- My school, where I am growing both in a spiritual and secular way.
- Everything I have ever been blessed with in my life.
- And you.

Don't forget to be thankful for things.  It helps you see the good in the world.  And, let people know that you are thankful for them.  You never know when it will be the last time for you to do that.

W. W. Phelps

This is another project for my Doctrine and Covenants class.  I researched a man named W. W. Phelps to find out more information about him.  Here is what I got.

William Wines Phelps (aka W. W. Phelps) was born on February 17, 1792 in Hanover, Morris County, New Jersey.  He worked as an editor at the Western Courier Newspaper, and he was also nominated for the office of lieutenant governor of New York.  He didn’t get the nomination, but he did get valuable experience.  On March 26, 1830, Phelps read that the Book of Mormon was about to come off the press.  He met Parley P. Pratt, who sold him a copy of the book.  After reading it, Phelps went to Kirtland, Ohio and met Joseph Smith.  After W. W. Phelps inquired what the Lord wanted him to do, he was told to be baptized and take his family to Missouri.  So, he did.  Phelps brought a lot of great talent to the Church.  He set up the first printing press, he published the first Church newspaper, he helped select, prepare, and publish many revelations in the Book of Commandments, and he wrote many hymns.  One of which is “The Spirit of God”, which is my favorite hymn. 

In Doctrine and Covenants 55:4, it states, “And again, you shall be ordained to assist my servant Oliver Cowdery to do the work of printing, and of selecting and writing books for schools in this church, that little children also may receive instruction before me as is pleasing unto me.”  W. W. Phelps said this about his calling.  “As a people we are fast approaching a desired end, which may literally be called a beginning. Thus far, we cannot be reproached with being backward in instruction. By revelation, in 1831, I was appointed to ‘do the work of printing, and of selecting and writing books for schools in this church, that little children might receive instruction;’ and since then I have received a further sanction. We are preparing to go out from among the people, where we can serve God in righteousness; and the first thing is, to teach our children; for they are as the Israel of old. It is our children who will take the kingdom and bear it off to all the world. The first commandment with promise to Israel was, ‘Honor thy father and thy mother, that thy days may be long in the land, which the Lord thy God giveth thee.’ We will instruct our children in the paths of righteousness; and we want that instruction compiled in a book.” ( Times and Seasons, 1 Nov. 1845, p. 1015.)  This shows to me that he was very persistent and intuitive when it came to his church callings; that he really wanted to help make a difference.

As members of this church today, we need to be better.  We need to want to make a difference in the lives of others, and help them get better within their own callings and their lives.  We need to find a way to help the church become a bigger part in the lives of others, and we need to show our appreciation for it.  W. W. Phelps followed the Lord’s direction, and that led to happiness in his life.  If we do the same, we will also receive happiness in our lives.

(Information found in Doctrine and Covenants Student Manual and the Doctrine and Covenants)

What do YOU say to Taking Chances?

And maybe this is going too fast.

And maybe it's not meant to last,

But what do you say to taking chances,

What do you say to jumping off the edge?

Never knowing if there's solid ground below

Or hand to hold, or hell to pay,

What do you say?

Don't drink a whole bottle of Martinelli's by yourself.

At least, not in less than half an hour.  Seriously, it will make you feel super sick.

Trust me.

Never forget you are a Child of God.

"Don't waste your time feeling sorry for yourself. Don't belittle yourself. Never forget that you are a child of God. You have a divine birthright. Something of the very nature of God is within you. The Psalmist sang, 'I have said, Ye are gods; and all of you are children of the most High.' (Psalm 82:6.)"
 -Gordon B. Hinckley

Word Vomit?

Back in December 2008, I wrote a blog all about me at the time.  It's amazing to see what has stayed the same, and what has changed.

Readers, my life has changed a lot more than I ever thought possible.  I saw some of the things coming, but most of what has happened during the last year of my life I never could have imagined happening to me or anyone else, for that matter.  That makes some days hard.

But, with each passing day, I am getting better.  Stronger.  I realize now that everything truly does happen for a reason.  Some happen for you to learn from.  Some, to help get you out of bad situations.  Some, just to bring happiness and strength to you.

To be completely honest, I never knew if I would get to where I am right now.  I just... didn't know how to be my best self.  I didn't know how to change the things in my life I knew I needed to in order to truly get better.  But it's amazing how much power and happiness can come from not trying to get through things by yourself.  In order to get through the trials I was facing, I needed to lean on many people, the main person being my Heavenly Father.  With all their help, I was able to get past things, and begin the process of being... Me.  Not the me everyone wanted to be, but the me I knew was waiting to come out.

To get to this point, one thing I needed to do was just let go.  Let go of my pain, let go of the bad, let go of those holding me back.  Another thing was to move on.  I can't help everyone, no matter how much I think I can.  I can only do my best, and then move on if nothing changes.  Another thing was to work on getting better.  To be a better person.  It's hard to not sit around and mope about the past, but I have learned that, if I want to be better, I need to just learn from the past and look to the future.

There are many more things that I have had to do in order to make myself better, but I won't go into detail about everything.

Today was a pretty rocky day.  I spent a good chunk of time looking at old pictures, reading old blogs, and just thinking about how so much can change in such a short amount of time.  It really is amazing to me how someone can be in one path of life and then completely change their path, some for the better, some for the worse.  I, hopefully, am on a path for the better.  I would like to believe that I am, but you never know.  I do know, though, that what has happened in my past will NEVER happen again.  I won't allow it.  I will not be lead to believe impossible truths.  I will not be forced to do what I don't want to.  And I will not allow myself to feel guilty for doing things that I enjoy doing.

Everything that I do from here on out will be for me.  Not because someone wants me to, not because I think others want me to do it, but because I really feel like doing it.

I am not gonna lie, it's been kinda hard to not be scared about things.  Feelings, events, everything.  I just don't know how to deal with various things, and not allowing them to make me... stress.  Don't get me wrong, I like feeling this way.  I like being happy.  I am just afraid that it is all going to blow up in my face, I suppose. That's what has happened in the past to me one too many times, so it is hard to not think that it will happen this time.  I sure hope it doesn't, because that would really suck.

Through it all, though, there are still a lot of things that I love and am thankful for.  It's hard to be pessimistic in a world where I keep finding things to love and cherish.  Most days, I am an optimist.  Don't get me wrong, there are days where I just want to hide under a rock and never come out, but most of the time I can see the beauty in things around me.  Can you?  I know, it's hard, but if you look hard enough, you can find something to love and be thankful for.

I love my family.  I love my roommates.  I love my friends.  I love my religion.  I love the truths that it has taught me.  I love the help that I am able to give and receive.  I am thankful for people who are willing to listen when I really just need to talk.  I am thankful for a place like Rexburg, Idaho, where I can feel safe at any time of the day.  I am thankful for my Savior, and the sacrifice He made so that I can have a happy, spirit-filled life while here on Earth and after I die.  It's amazing to me that someone wanted to sacrifice His life for the love He felt for me, for my roommates, for my family, for anyone who has lived, is living, and will live on this Earth.  What a wonderful gift.

No matter what, my life is beautiful.  It truly is.  There is no way that I can deny that fact, especially with the progress that I have made so far in my life.  I have a family who loves and supports me.  I have friends who love and support me as well.  I have faith in my church, and it brings me comfort.  And I know that, even through the darkest times of my life, these things will always be there.  No matter what, these will be constant things in my life.

This is a lot of word vomit, I know.  There have just been a lot of things on my mind, and I have finally found a way to get most of the things out.  I sure hope you don't mind this blog.  There was just a lot that needed to come out.

I still have a lot more, but that will have to wait until another day. :)

LOVES <3

I love my sister.

"I am going to go eat Symone, I will talk to you later. Oh my gosh that makes it seem like i am coming to eat you.... rawr." -Sydney

My name is Symone, and I am stuck in this in-between.  Ugh.

My mind is like a... Tornado? Hurricane? Mess?

Ever have those times where you just have so many different things on your mind at one time, and don't know exactly how to express what is there?  And no matter how many times you try to clear your mind, it just never works?  Well, if you have, then you will understand what is going on with me right now.

I just have a lot of things rolling around in my mind, ranging from important to random to just plain dumb.  I am having a lot of difficulty expressing my thoughts, hence the reason why they are still in my mind.

One day, I may just write a long, super random letter that lists every single thing on my mind.  Maybe not.  I just need to find some way to get my brain to shut up at night!

Alright, I am done with my rant.  Blah, time to be a good student and work on my homework.

LOVES <3

Everything will fall into place.

"God knows better than you what you need. He always attempts to speak to you. Listen, and follow the uncomfortable suggestions that He makes to us--everything will fall into its place."

Last semester (April-July 2010), I had a strong feeling to do something that I knew would make me feel uncomfortable.  A feeling to tell someone something that had been on my mind for a while.  A feeling to get rid of  some of the bad feelings that had begun to take over my life.  I knew I would be uncomfortable, but I knew that being uncomfortable wouldn't last very long.  Was I going to let the fear of what would happen hold me back from becoming happy again?

I eventually followed that feeling to talk, and now things are better than they have been in an extremely long time.

I am getting that feeling again.  To do something that will make me uncomfortable.  But, I know that God knows what He is doing.  I'll just have to wait and see what happens.

My life...

 I have some pretty amazing people in my life right now.

Thanks for sticking around.

Phone = Off

I just need time to think.